Wednesday, November 5, 2008
She's Just Monica from the Block
How did we know that we needed a wedding planner? Because we were about to kill eachother, that's how.
We have a date. We have a venue. What we don't have is our sanity. H's work schedule has become insane in the weeks following the engagement. She got drafted in to second chair a $9 mil wrongful death matter in one of the suburban courts. Its just two weeks - 15 hours a day during the most critical time of the planning. No biggie. Now, trials are a strange bitch - during the week prior and through the duration of the trial, you eat, sleep, drive and shower with the facts of the case. You have nightmares about the cross-examinations. You have nightmares that your lead witness suddenly changed his/her testimony. You have nightmares that the Mark Paul Gosselaar legal drama on TNT will get picked up for another season. It sucks. Not just for you, but for everyone around you.
This made things difficult. H had no time during the day to make decisions. And, at night, she didn't want to deal with the wedding. Simply put, she wasn't into this and it was driving a wedge between us. Finally, in typical fashion, I aired my grievances in a phone call while she was at work...this wedding, with the way it was going, may break us - we entertained just taking the money and running - we'd just go to the Justice of the peace and have him marry us. We agreed that "we" were more important than "it" (the wedding), but if we really wanted to go through with this, we would need a planner.
Thankfully, everyone and their hairdresser knows a planner. I had clients suggesting people. Bus Drivers. The Fed EX lady that I think is crushing on me...it was crazy. I think there is a quiet understanding amongst people that just have been married that the planning part of the day is insanely stressful...some people may love it. We were not those people. All advice was welcomed.
(Baby's) Breath of Fresh Air
Ultimately, we sought counsel from the events coordinator at the Indianapolis Public Library - where, if you have been following - is where we are planning to get married. Nora suggested Monica Richard of Detail + Design. Within an hour or two, Monica had e-mailed and attempted to set up a time to speak. We loved this...we hadn't even been introduced, but she was making the first move. This never happened to me in college.
From the start Monica (hereafter "M") was awesome...she reached out to H and helped assuage some of her wedding planning anxieties. She was professional. She was cool. I think we knew before we even set up the date with her, that we were going to use her. As I talked about earlier, we were in Indy to look at the sites (and for a wedding)(which I may not have talked about earlier). We set up a time to meet with M. She asked us for a "wants" list and a "don't want" list regarding our wedding - it was supposed to be 6 things total - M got more than she bargained for - our list was 42 things long. We're picky. Some of the favorites of the "don't want" list: Ties; religion; and the bouquet toss. Traditions be damned.
The First Date
I was really anxious about meeting M. It was my understanding that she only did 10-12 weddings a year. So, this meeting, to me, at least, was about impressing upon her that we were cool. Which can be hard for me. I get nervy. I talk too much. I make uncomfortable jokes. How has H stayed with me? How did I ever get a second date when I am this fumbly and geeky?
Not surprisingly, H shined at this meeting and her and M really hit it off. It was a match made in heaven. My future Mother-in-Law was in tow (she and H wore matching outfits...no kidding). She was even impressed. Apparently, we impressed upon M enough that we were OK people and she agreed that she could make herself available to us. We took a day to decide and called M on our way back to the CHI. We were in...the check is in the mail. I was thrilled. We hadn't budgeted for this, but, god willing, M has been our savior. As I cruised at 85 MPH north on I-65, the tension that could have have been our biggest obstacle, was lifted.