Nice.

I am not really prone to short posts (see below), but I would be remiss if I did not post that one of H's bridesmaids, Deb, and her husband, Robby, welcomed a new addition to their family yesterday afternoon. Jonah Benjamin was born at 12:17 PM yesterday afternoon. Congratulations! We're so happy for you and are looking forward to meeting the little guy.

Divas for the Day...

Yesterday we met with our photographer, Nate Rowe of Nathanial Edmunds Photography, for our engagement photos. Let me say this at the onset - Whitney Houston - the grandest of all divas - has nothing on either H or me. To prepare for our photo shoot, we took Friday to get ourselves in the right state of mind - this included tanning (yes, tanning) and fashion shows and the like. Before I fell asleep that night, I said to H - "Don't laugh at me, but I have been practicing my smile a lot today. H responded - "I won't laugh. I have too." I do love that girl.

We were scheduled to meet with Nate at 1 PM. Before that, however, we had some work to do. I had committed to drink beers and watch Arsenal storm to a 2-0 win over Man City. H had committed to attend the baby shower of our neighbor - Messy Mandy (this is how she is programmed in my cell phone as well as the way that H and I refer to her. Messy Mandy owns and operates her own business Messy Mandy - as a personal assistant to help get her clients organized, be it for tax season or Thanksgiving dinner - she does it all. For the male readers - she is kinds of like the "Wolf" in "Pulp Fiction.")(We think the world of Messy Mandy and highly recommend - we know her as our neighbor, but also know how committed she is to her client)(shameless plug is over).

Anyway - H - dressed for the photos and looking absolutely classic and stunning - went to the baby shower and had a few glasses of Riesling to ease her nerves about the picture taking (this is going to be a theme). I picked her up about twenty to one and we were off to the first location: Paramount Room.

For those who have read this blog with any sort of consistency, you'll know that Paramount Room is a very special place to H and I. Since we moved in together in May, 2007, we have been going to Paramount Room for Friday happy hour. We love it there. The night I proposed, I arranged a little engagement party at PR for some of our friends and family to surprise H (it worked). We cannot say enough good things about the people and the vibe this place has. It doesn't hurt that they have a great beer selection for me and a unique and well done cocktail list for H.

About two weeks ago, H and I decided that we'd like to have some of our engagement photos taken at PR. I immediately contacted Jacquie via Facebook to see if this was feasible. Not only was it feasible - she was as excited about it as we were. Jacquie started at Paramount Room shortly after H and I started going there. She has become a friend. She was our server for the engagement party and she has been there virtually every time we have. H loves her and constantly leaves notes on our bill telling her the same. When we got to Paramount, the front booth was reserved for us. Which was perfect. Its the best seat in the house, the first place that we sat when we went there, and a great little corner for pictures. I would be guilty of neglect if I did not take a moment to thank Jacquie for all she did for us Saturday afternoon. She really went out of her way to make sure that we had a great time and were taken care of. It meant a lot to H and I. Thank you so, so much.

Nate showed up to Paramount shortly after we did. We sat and talked a little bit about our respective lives and the like. I think I have written about this in the past, but it is imperative to me that Nate gets a feel for us as people. I think that it helps everybody and will definitely help the end product. The more Nate gets a feel for us, the more comfortable we are with one another and the better the pictures. We had a great time, shared a few drinks (can I write that?) and got a good feel for how this was going to go. Without cue Nate started taking pictures. First it was our glassware, then the "Evil b. gone" plaque behind me. It was kind of crazy to me. A few moments before we were talking about Chicago and then it was like Nate turned on his "professional" switch and immediately went to work. It was kind of cool, because you could see his mind working for cool shots and different angles. He seemed instantly aware of all his surroundings and worked quickly - it was really interesting for me to see.

A funny thing happened though - H got really camera shy. Nate would tell us (in his raspy voice)(he was in a bar that was too loud the night before) to "look natural" and "pretend [he's] not there" or to "just carry on a conversation." The only thing H would say while we were carrying on was "I hate this. I hate this. I hate this." Who knew? I for one, think she was just saying it. She looked beautiful. She is beautiful. The camera loves her.

I think the problem - for both of us - is that we have never just had our picture taken by a professional. We have thousands of pictures that we have taken. But nothing like this. It took a little bit to get used to. That, plus, after M, this is the one of the first things that actually signifies our wedding in action, if that makes sense. We have made plans and a hundred decisions. But this was the first one of those decisions in action, I guess. And, if we are thinking of reasons - we really like Nate - but for us, its difficult to separate that relationship from the existing working relationship. We want people to like us - which can be defied by the fact that he was there to do his job for us.

We left Paramount and went outside We stressed that we wanted our engagement shoot to be a little grittier than a normal photo shoot. We are not tandem bicycles on the lake front path. We are not in front of a tree with our names carved into it. I think Nate figured this out pretty quickly and after we had some pictures taken with the Pug (who had dutifully been waiting in the wheel well of the car) in front of the endangered species murals on Hubbard, Nate got us to climb up some rocks onto the Metra tracks that run just north behind Paramount Room. It was awesome. Some great city views and the gritty we were looking for. I don't know what possessed him to climb up there and decide that this was the spot for our next shots, but he did it and I cannot wait to see these photos. We finished on our roof with the entire city scape behind us - which was great too - since, early on we indicated to NEP that being on that roof is one of our three favorite things to do together.

I dropped Nate at the house he was staying at and picked up some burritos for H and I. I cannot stress enough how much fun we had on Saturday. It was great working with Nate and NEP. It is clear to us why he is as in demand as he is. He is up for anything and really works with the client. It meant a lot to H and I that he listened to our suggestions and was willing to roll with it. I think sometimes the art can cloud the artist's work. The goal here was to take good pictures that capture our personalities. We are not conventional and I think Nate really went above and beyond to capture that aspect of us. Obviously, as I wrote earlier, NEP has been recognized for excellence in its field. But, I believe Nate when he says that the awards, while nice, are not what he works for. He works for the pictures and the people he's shooting. I know he killed it Saturday and I know for a fact that there is a picture I am going to love from this set - and I hope its one where H is sitting in the booth at Paramount Room with her feet up and I am whispering something sweet in her ear.

UPDATE: The pictures turned out amazing. For a small taste - you should visit the NEP Photo Blog - we are so, so pleased with how these came out and cannot wait to see what they come up with at the wedding.

Glad you could make it...

Lately, I have been obsessed with the rise of the internet news medium at the expense of the newspaper (I think it all started when I listened to a 55 minute podcast argument between Bill Simmons and Chuck Klosterman) and while, this 'blog' falls into the realm of 'internet news medium' this fascination has manifested a fear that this blog simply does not have a readership. I blame work firewalls (and content)(naturally).

H and I stayed up late on Friday night drunk dialing our moms and brainstorming ways to increase readership of this blog - Aided by bottles of Chilean wine (hello Root:1) and Chimay - I think we nailed it and hope that by the middle of this week, we will gain at least 50 - 196 new readers. Obviously, we are extremely excited about the wedding and the increased traffic on this site, but thought that it would be appropriate to maybe let the new readers know what this is all about.

H and I were engaged on September 26, 2008 - immediately thereafter, H went to Trial on a $9mil wrongful death litigation. Needless to say, the wedding and the planning of the wedding was not at the forefront of H's "to-do" list.

In fact, it wasn't on the list at all.

For the first 30 days of the engagement, I was in charge (thats not entirely true - since we hired our planner about three weeks after the engagement). But, for all intents and purposes, I was thrown in the deep end with flowers, venues, invitations, photographers, mothers-in-laws and caterers. I realized quickly that I was in waaaay over my head, but also given a real opportunity to be part of the world that men/grooms are not normally allowed.

I decided to keep an online journal here - mainly for H (and my own sanity), but also for an information center for the guests and anyone else that is interested. So far, three people are interested.

I encourage all the readers to take a look around. Get comfortable with the content. Make comments. There is even some useful information about the wedding here - I intend to update things here (between work and the wedding diet and reality television - when I have the time) and talk in broader terms about the wedding and the grooms role in wedding planning.

More than anything, we really hope that you get a good feel for H and I as a couple. Many of you know me or you know H - but few of you know us. We look forward to seeing a lot of you in a few months, when, against her better judgment, H makes an honest man out of me.

No Kidding...

It has been eerily quiet the last two weeks in wedding central. We received D+D's "vision" of the wedding. Its going to look amazing. In fact, after reading Gene's description of the design of the wedding, my Mesnick-esque vernacular will not do any of his thoughts justice. (BTW - I totally intended to do a whole write-up on the Melissa-Molly-Mesnick Bachelor 3-part Finale - somehow, though, I was beaten to the punch by most of America. I have thoughts on it that I will spare you dear reader (short: he's a cad). I just hope that Jillian keeps her dignity when she becomes the Bachelorette here in May).

H and I have discussed this blog over the last few weeks and it occurs to us that we don't want to give away the farm here. We are coming up on a time where this little page will be become public knowledge to our guests (rather than a wine drunk admission or a link on H's facebook page) - so, I guess, I will begin discussing more "big picture" wedding stuff from my perspective, rather than detail oriented posts. Which is nice - since, I do not and cannot remember or spell the names of most of the flowers. We are less than 6 months away from the "i'll take 'ems" and I think we have everything in pretty good order.

That said, as most of you know H and I are a little older than most couples we know when they got married. We are both post-30 (barely). That said, most of our friends are of the same age and have been married for several years and have started little families. All of their children are adorable and we have both enjoyed watching all of their personalities develop and seeing all the pictures. I have remarked to H on several occasions that many of my friends are amazing parents, since their children are impeccably behaved. Unfortunately, there is only going to be one child at this wedding - and it snorts and sheds and licks every ankle in sight. Granted - there may be a slight exception for my cousin and their children - but overall, we are thinking that this is going to be a child free wedding.

Like Mesnick (who wouldn't be able to bring Ty, btw), we struggled with this decision. We do not want to and its certainly not our intention to ostracize any of our guests who have children. We are looking at our big picture here. This is not going to be the place for a child. Its going to (hopefully) be a late night, with drinking and dancing and the like and we want our guests, including the parents, to be able to have a great, kid-free, time. Plus, its our hope that many of those parents in attendance will look forward to a night (or two) sans kids. - so they can get what we like to term "the kids are staying with grandma tonight drunk." We toyed with the idea of hiring a sitter or doing some sort of day-care set up - the problem there, again, is that if the child is on site, our guests are bound to want to check in on them occasionally, if not stay with them all night.

I know that this decision is bound to ruffle some feathers. I also acknowledge that this bright-line "no kids" policy may affect turn-out. We just hope that everyone understands that this is our wedding, which, we hope, is a reflection of our life. We want everyone to have a great time, unwind and enjoy a well-deserved night out. So, while we love your kids - H has even held one or two of them - the Pug is going to be the only 'kid' at this wedding - and even she is staying with a sitter that night!

We have great taste...

Leave it to me to make this all about us - but, seriously, we know how to pick 'em.

Friday night, our planner, M, won several ISES (International Special Events Society) Indiana PACE awards for her work as a planner. My understanding is that this night is like Oscar night for "her people", but instead of Micky Rourke's ridiculous white tuxedo, all of the wedding people (planners, designers, photographers, etc.) get together to honor each other for their work and achievements over the last year.

As indicated on her Facebook Status Page - M and the company she is part of, Detail + Design, made out like Michael Phelps that night - they went 8-for-8 (there is no photographic evidence which would lead us to believe that they pulled a Phelps (or a two-footer) at the after-party). What is particularly remarkable is the fact that M was nominated for and won awards including Best Wedding ($100K+) and Best Wedding ($20K or less). H and I were really impressed by that - since it indicates M's complete ability to plan a wedding with any budget. It gives us complete confidence that she will be able to help us plan our perfect day inside the constraints of our budget.

If you have been reading this blog, you'd know that we think the world of M. She has been an amazing asset to this wedding. Without her guidance, we shudder to think where we'd be. Its nice to see M recognized for her dedication and brilliance and to know that H and I are not the only people that think that she is absolutely fabulous.

I would be remiss if I didn't also congratulate the entire Detail + Design Team, as well as Nathanial Edmunds Photography, who took home "Best Photographer." Its really exciting to know that we're going to be surrounded by all of these incredibly talented people on our wedding day.

Yuppie Coffee and Mimosa Party

Yesterday morning, we knocked the cobwebs off and went to what was labeled by a friend as "the most yuppy sounding thing ever!" - the Wedding Registry class at Crate and Barrel. The class - starting at 9:00 AM at the Crate/Barrel on Michigan Avenue - is a 2 hour free-for-all in the store. You are greeted by a cabal of falsely excited CB employees that may secretly hate you for getting them up 2 hours before they may normally get out of bed and roll out of their parents house in Tinley. You get coffee and mimosas and little cakes and muffins with frosting and then you are split in groups of ten or so and given a tour of the store. Upon completion of the tour, they give you a little scanner and told you that you have about 105 minutes before the soccer moms in cheap leather coats from Chattanooga, TN in town for Spamalot and Michigan Avenue shopping trips are alllowed into the store. We better get to work.

This was - At the same time - the most intimidating and exhilarating thing ever.

We have both struggled with the idea that we are selecting things that we want people to buy us. If you haven't noticed we are in a recession, so the idea of making a list of mid-priced items that we may or may not need seems a little strange to us (of course, this logic was dismissed when we registered for an $1100 chair because we liked the color "canoe green")(I have seen some ridiculous registries, but this item definitely takes the cake)(Sorry everyone!). So, there is that element and then the fact that H and I started dating at 28 and have lived together for almost 2 years. We have accumulated a lot of things for the house. We have pots and pans and dish rags and towels and forks and colanders and what have you - they all work just fine.

I learned quickly that the key to registering for wedding gifts is to suspend logic and just look at and scan the stuff that you might use at some time. Simple enough. Symbolically, we registered for the above-pictured meat tenderizer first. It is basically the only thing that I want - every since seeing Trainer Bob on Biggest Loser show some contestant how to flatten chicken breast so it cooks more evenly and gets rid of some of the fat - I have been obsessed. I had used a hammer for a while - so the thought of actually having the proper kitchen utensil to do this is going to be awesome. I am going to tenderize everything!

Admittedly, once we got past the "do we really need an egg-timer" phase and started registering and asking questions about styles and place-settings, it got kind of fun. The fact that the store was free of Europeans benefiting from the current euro-US Dollar exchange rate was nice. All the couples were great - if they saw that you were at the knives, they would go somewhere else and then circle back later (the guy in shorts and a gold windbreaker from Charlotte, NC may just reach around you, or just breathe on your neck while you are trying to determine what cuisanart products were the best for you).

I asked H later what her favorite part was and she said the idea of registering for all these things that we will use in our future together. That's simple enough. And true enough. It was fun for H and I talk about what kind of couple we are and what we want to do with the house and what kind of parties we want to have and what our future together will be like. It was fun to think that we would have some of these items for our next 20 years (if Dan in knives is to be believed) and that they would be ours, rather than the items that we both contributed to the house when we moved in together (my couch, her lamps, etc).

It will be nice when it is all 'our home.'

Boot Camp

H and I were in Indianapolis last weekend for what M affectionately called "Bridal Boot Camp" (nevermind the fact that I was 'required' to attend as well)(wedding planning is so sexist). The basic aim of the weekend was to meet our photographers and to get down to the nitty-gritty and start putting our 'vision' into action. To do so, H and I spent all week creating our vision boards, like the nutjob (Renee?) in the first episode of this season's "The Bachelor" to really 'visualize' the wedding in an effort to 'realize' the wedding (Mine was on a green posterboard with bedazzled words like "dalliance" and "elegant" - H's was a little more forthright - it simply read "BAM!!" with random pictures she pulled from Domino Magazine). OK - so, we didn't really do the vision boards - but, whatever, we had thoughts - and pictures. Lots of pictures.

The trip didn't start out great - I went to work in the morning and H would pick me up around noon. Naturally, at 12:10 PM, I freaked out and put a small, passive aggressive phone call in...it did not go over very well. Thankfully, H downloaded and played "I'm on a Boat" and everything was forgotten.

We made good time (very important to me) and immediately upon our arrival, it was on - dinner with H's parents and then drinks with M (arm cast and all), and Nate and Tiffany from NEP - our photographers. I have to point out that we had drinks in Zionsville, IN at a place called the Lobby - in the Brick Street Inn - If we ever move to Indianapolis (big if) - I want to live in Zionsville. It is a perfect little town and the Lobby serves Saison Du Pont - which is strange in an awesome way. I was pretty nervous about this meeting - I really wanted Nate and Tiffany to like us and to be as excited about the process. I am convinced if they think we're cool, we'll get 'cool' pictures. I don't know why - probably some deep-seeded high school esteem issue I have yet to deal with. More than that, H and I think its important that Nate gets a good feel for our personalities - if we're all comfortable with one another, then we think that makes for great photos. I think we all vibed right away - though I have had H pester M to make sure that they liked us - strangely no confirmation yet.

As is custom, I fell asleep and H stayed up watching television, having a glass (bottle) of wine and going through old pictures - around 3 AM, she finally came to bed. We were due to be at Detail + Design to meet with M and Gene at 9:00 AM. This was a problem. We rolled in at 9:30 AM. We make great first impressions. I don't think we have been on time to a meeting yet.

We were casually told beforehand that Gene - the lead designer at D+D - could take whatever we tell him and kind of commit it to a vision. We think that he immediately understood what we wanted - and was able to offer suggestions and show us examples. It was pretty amazing when you think about it. I don't even know if H and I knew exactly what we wanted, but Gene was able to figure us and our vision out. I don't want to spoil it with details and the like, but I have to say, that we are both extremely excited about how this is going to look. I can't wait to see our guest's faces when they walk into the reception - it could be ridiculous.

Gene left us to M for the rest of the afternoon for some tough love - budget talks, timelines, marriage licenses - all the little things that we just don't think about and/or don't know about getting married. Since M is crazy organized - she will have this wedding planned to what seems like the minute. I am glad that she is on our side. We can't be profusive enough in our praise for this woman. She should be equally commended for not ripping our heads off when we let her know that the "number" had inflated a little. We had originally anticipated inviting 160 - 180 people with hopes that 140 would be our final guest tally - M had budgeted everything around this number. You could actually feel the exasperation in her voice when we kind of casually mentioned that the number of invitees was closer to 200. Oops.

It was at this point that we let M know a little secret - its the off-shore wedding account. An account that H secretly has been putting money into to help pay for some things wedding related - like her dress and some other 'big ticket' items. So, our budget has been slightly misleading for a while now. We like our secrets, but for the sake of the coordinator - uncoordinated relationship, we thought best to let M (and all 6 of you readers) in on this one - sorry M!

Levity had been restored - the sigh of relief in the room blew our hair back (and our vision boards off the wall).