The Beginning...

My wife is sleeping.

That has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? And it should too, since H and I were married this past weekend in what was the best night of my life and (but for my golf game and Arsenal's 4-2 loss to citeh) the most perfect and memorable weekend I have ever had.

I know weddings are like babies - everyone thinks their kid is cute and well behaved, just as everyone person two days after getting married, thinks their wedding was the most amazing event ever...but, seriously, our wedding was the most amazing night ever. Everything. Was. Perfect.

I could go into some detail, gushing about each and every person that made this wedding so amazing, but then I would feel like Miley Cyrus accepting a Teen Choice Award ("God. Hellllloooo!") - so, I will save that for the letters and cards and recommendations and e-mails, and wall posts and everything else. Lets just say that everyone - vendors, planners, parents and all the guests - made this wedding what it was and H and I are incredibly fortunate to start our life together surrounded by the love, laughter and good people. Without our friends and family, H and I would not be possible. Each of them accept us as a couple that may be a little left of center, that has their pug as their flower girl and that chooses a reading from Ben Folds' first solo album, rather than a scripture. They let us be the couple we are and appreciate us for that. It will not be forgotten or taken for granted.

So, you may ask, whats next for us - in a word - everything (maybe even live blogging from the honeymoon). Thank you so much for being a part of our day and for the love and support and friendship that you have provided both of us over the last 12 months of the engagement.

Sleepless in Chicago...

H has been complaining lately that - consumed with anxiety about the wedding - she has not been able to sleep. I, on the other hand, have been sleeping like a baby...

Until last night.

I had my first "everything is going to go wrong at the wedding" nightmare. Not good times. This one was pretty simple - My groomsmen and I were all lining up before the ceremony (in my parents' kitchen, strangely). There were two fundamental problems. First, I was in a black shirt and white tie with a black coat and white lapels. Not a big deal - in my dream, I was going to fix that by running to Macys. Even Dream me thinks quick on his feet.

The second issue was a little more complicated. One of my groomsmen was replaced by a dirty drunk version of somebody I went to high school with - who was wearing the exact same thing as me, but with cargo pants.

Weird.

Rest assured - I checked the closet this morning. My shirt is still white.

Entering Washington...

H and I spent the weekend in Washington D.C. Which was nice. It was good to get out of town and this was my first time in our Nation's capitol. I was one of the few people in my 8th grade class who's parents pulled him out of the Washington D.C. trip on account of Desert Storm. Thank god, right? If my parents were parents in the 60's, I would have loved to see their bomb shelter. In any event, that week LZJHS treated the 8th graders to a movie. I got to go see "White Fang." Which was pretty awesome. I have always loved Ethan Hawke's early works. He was a genius. Its a shame what has happened to him since he started writing books.

H and I were in town for a college friend of hers who was getting married in Northern Virginia and were staying with her good friend Sarah and her husband Karl - who were nice enough to take us in, feed us and buy us chappy beers. Karl and Sarah - if you're reading - thank you. We had a great time.

The trip started a little rough. I am neurotic. I have airport issues. I don't travel well. I am constantly distracted. I drive H crazy. Really crazy. Until we are actually in the air, I am a mess. Naturally, our flight left 90 minutes late. So, I was pretty relaxed. If I was seated next to children I would have lost it. It wasn't until we saw the Washington Monument from the plane that I finally calmed down. I'm awesome. I have no idea what H sees in me sometimes.

We spent most of Friday site-seeing and grasshopper eating (hello Oyamel!) and then had drinks at Oya (which, according to H is the best decorated place she has ever been in)(it was pretty awesome). We housed several drinks and met her girlfriends for dinner (note: I was a total cock in the henhouse - one of two husbands/boyfriends able to make the wedding) at some Tapas place near the Verizon center. I was kind of shocked, but DC was a pretty good food town thus far.

H's friends Cindy and Steve were married on Saturday. This is only the second wedding H and I have been to together since we have been engaged. At the first one - back in March - we weren't really thinking about our wedding. This time we were. The wedding was elegant and beautiful - and we had such a wonderful time - and it scared us sh*tless. It magnified all the things we need to do before we even get to the Library. First, we have so much work to do. There are a million little things to do here in the next several weeks. We are not sleeping. We are stressed. Good times. Ultimately, we know we can lean on Monica and she'll guide us (I am sure she has this all under control) through the process. The wedding is basically planned - we just need to put the finishing touches on it. But that does not diminish the fact that it still needs to get done. We want to avoid those horror stories you hear about staying up until 5 AM making place cards - that would be a nightmare.

The second thing this wedding showed was what we are missing at our wedding. Both H and I have lost people in our lives that would be central to this process. It wasn't until the traditional parent dances that this struck me - and it weighed on H too. We had a great night, but when the wedding was over, we went straight back to Karl and Sarah's house and sat on the porch and broke down. Both of us were a mess. I have not been able to put it too far from my mind since then (I blame H). I am going to miss my Dad that day - I am going to miss that talk I get to have with him about marriage - afterall, he made it work for 40+ years before he passed away. I just miss him. Its funny that weddings and funerals are probably the only two things that really bring this out (and Northwestern v. Wisconsin)(for completely different reasons).

I think we needed this. I think H needed to know that I am just as bothered by this missing piece as she is... that we're a team and that we're in this together. I think its one of the real unique things about H and I. We've shared this incredible loss. She came into my life less than a year after I lost my Dad and supported me and I have leaned on her (whether she knows it or not) ever since. I know I can count on her and only pray that she counts on me for the same support. So - we sat on the porch and we cried. Together.

The next morning we packed up and quietly left DC. When we boarded our flight and I was seated next to two 9-year olds flying without their parents - H just laughed.

Hotel Indianapolis

Hey everyone - just a reminder - if you plan on staying in the room block at the hotel, please reserve your room sooner rather than later. The NFL schedule was released a few weeks back and the Indianapolis Colts open up that weekend at home against Jacksonville. Our fear is that the block will be opened up and people are going to miss out on the special room rates - and have a difficult time finding a room in the city on account of the game. The Jags travel large. I mean, who wouldn't want to leave Jacksonville, right? The hotel information is on the Save-the-Date cards and/or the invite (or you can e-mail H or I and we will give you the information). Awesome.

Seriously...

I don't invest...but if I did, judging by the number of black and white boxes I have thrown away in the last 3 days - and taking into account whether Crate & Barrel is a publicly traded company - I would buy stock. Lots of it. Because I have a feeling that their earning this 3rd quarter are going to be higher than anticipated.

H had her one and only wedding shower this past weekend in Chicago. I am not going to write much about it. Alas, I wasn't there. I was busy golfing with my soon to be father-in-law, Richard. He beat me by 40 strokes. I am not a good golfer.

The shower was held at Branch 27 - a new restaurant near our house. Cary and his staff put out a great spread and it appears that everyone had fun. The girls all loved the server Kevin - who, by the time I got there to load the presents into the car, had baby's breath in his hair.

To everyone that attended - thank you. H loved everything and I am so thankful that you all could make it. Special kudos go out to H's Mom, Sandra, my Mom, Carol and H's bridesmaids - who all hosted this event and made this a shower for H to remember. It seems like everything really came together amazingly and I am so appreciative of your efforts on behalf of my favorite girl. Special props go out to the girls who bought the cake (shown above) (Jrise and CKang, I think?) - its pretty awesome, though, it may be derailing my wedding diet.

Magic Cards...

We are less than seven weeks away...invitations were dropped a few Saturdays ago (props out to Sandra H - H's Mom - for doing the leg work and getting these out). My understanding is that these things are beautiful. I wouldn't actually know, since H did this one on her own. She met with a woman named Gloria in May and kind of laid out what she was thinking. There was no mock-up. There were no drafts. Just Gloria and H (and Monica and Sandra H) sitting around brainstorming. Between you and me, I am a little glad that I missed. I don't work well in group settings - I am at my best when its just me, some saison du pont and an evite (and a bad attitude).

As I was saying - the invitations went out in the mail two Saturdays ago...on Thursday we started receiving the RSVPs.

You know you are wedding dorks when you have a little ritual for the RSVPs. I'll be the first to admit it. I am a huge wedding nerd...and I have turned H over to the dark side. Every night for the last seven days (that mail has come), H or I (whoever gets the mail first), places the unopened RSVP cards (complete with the $0.44 customized Jezebel the Pug Stamp)(Pimp my stamp!) on the center of the kitchen table and we wait until the other gets home. The wait is excruciating...Admittedly, we peek (you can make out whether the RSVP is an "accept with pleasure" or "decline with regret" through the envelope - as well as whether a vegetarian dish is requested (so far there have been 5 vegetarian dishes requested - good for you readers!). We then split them up and begin opening them one-by-one.

We then argue about who had the better RSVP... usually H opens the one from the people I invite or that she invites. Which means she gets all the ones with the little notes written on them (which I never knew was allowed - though, we are the first people I know that are getting the RSVP cards - they usually go to the parents). It makes me jealous.

Why am I writing about such a mundane wedding detail. Other than the fact that I am running out of material? Easy. There is something about these cards that change H's mood almost immediately. Last Thursday, H came home hysterical - she was scheduled to begin a trial in a few weeks and felt like she was behind. She was also traveling to Indy (and leaving an hour later than she wanted) for the weekend and felt like she was missing valuable trial prep time (especially since I was out of pocket all weekend). This is also the day that we received our first 10 RSVP cards...almost instantly (after we opened the first), H's mood was transformed...she loved the notes and loved the fact that people were taking time out of their lives to join us on our day. I think she loved thinking about these people at our wedding. It was pretty remarkable - and, as she drove to Indy, she texted me about the people who responded (well, about one of the people that responded). I could tell her mood had changed. Her focus was off the trial for a little bit and was now focused on just how amazing her wedding is going to be...

And yes, dear reader - you have to respond. If only just for H.

She's got the fever...and the only treatment is more wedding bells

There has been a pretty consistent theme throughout these fifty+ posts - unless it has to do with music, H is not a fan of planning this wedding. It was a real issue between her and I before we agreed that the best thing for our engagement would be to hire Monica from Detail + Design to aid us as a wedding planner.

Something is changing...slowly....surely. Someone is embarrassed... someone is conflicted ... someone has wedding fever.

While I was out passing out at (or before) midnight with my friends for my bachelor party, H slipped away to Indiana to put a dent in our wedding 'to-do' list - make-up and hair run through - the Tasting at the Central Library - sit down with the designer - sit down with Monica - get wedding band for future husband - wedding (cup)cake tasting. What started as a major inconvenience (H has a trial starting in a few weeks) quickly turned into a series of text messages stating in no uncertain terms "OMG! Our wedding is going to be amazing!!" and Facebook wall posts saying "I am getting a little too giddy about this bridal situation and I don't know how I feel about it."

I don't know if giddy is the right word - I have never known H to get giddy - but she definitely has got the wedding fever and the only prescription is her taking a more active role these last few weeks. Its exciting. I love the fact that this wedding is going to have her stamp on it (in someways quite literally - since she was the brains behind the $0.44 customized Jezebel Pug Stamp on the RSVP cards)(as well as the creative drive behind the invites)(which I planned on talking about - but since I still haven't seen one, I remain silent)(I digress).

The point - as it has been throughout really - is that the whole process is infinitely more enjoyable when we are both immersed in it - H and I were talking about the stresses of planning the other day (a pretty routine conversation) - and I mentioned the things that are going to stick out as the memorable moments of our engagement (other than night we got engaged)(of course) and they were all things that we did together: quick trips to Indiana to see the Library; meeting with Monica; sharing a bottle of wine while we completed the save the date cards; faux dancing around the house to the song that we plan on having as our first dance ("Bump n' Grind" by R.Kelley)(I wish); and two weekends ago when we sat around with our computer and ipods and picked out songs that are "must plays" at the wedding.

H and I are often on the same page - but its those moments that really captures just how great of a team we are.