Why I'm Marrying Her: No. 820

Last night, H and I met for drinks after work. We grabbed some to-go and headed home to watch a movie. Once the movie was over, I decided to go to bed (it was 11:30 PM afterall).

H stayed up, drank a bottle of wine and watched r&b videos until 4AM.

Tying one on...

Interestingly enough, one of the more talked about decisions (read: thing I keep bringing up until I get my way) is what I am going to wear to my own wedding...

I loathe (yes, loathe!) rented tuxes. I have spent nearly $1500 in rented tuxedos over the course of the last 10 years...and all I have to show for it is a rash. There is little else I dislike more than a rented tux (a pin tie on the DJ while he plays the b-52's is the only thing that remotely comes close). The scratchy shirt. The ill fitting (PLEATED!!!) pants. The clunky shoes. Its all for the birds. I will not make my groomsmen wear tuxedos (you're welcome). I can't justify it. I'm a better friend than they are (you know, if you made me rent a tux).


I am a fan of Jcrew suits - flat front pants - cut for the tall-ish. I would wear it when I am not, you know, getting married. Perfect for my wedding. Understated and classic. I have my eye on one or two. You can take the guy out of Miami...

This is where H and I diverge - I have no interest in being buttoned up, or having a tie on at my own wedding. I think everyone thinks I am joking. But I am serious. Seriously. Despite my job - its not how I live my life. The second I am out of court, that tie is off. More than that - I like the look of a suit with no tie. I'm more comfortable, thereby, more confident (I think). Isn't that what we all want. Of course, there is compromise - I just don't think H (or her mother) are going to go for it.

I think I am going to lose this battle. I am prepared to lose this battle. Its just that when we watch Bridezillas, those crazy [girls] do everything short of holding their breath until they get what they want. Maybe I should start practicing...

The Story so far...

I have been doing this a whole week - I have tons of material (seriously, just wait until I break down the Lisa Copola episodes of Bridezillas). I promised H that when I became comfortable with the content of this blog, she can start letting people know about it...I have, so has she. Ultimately, we hope to use this space as an information center for our guests as well as a source of my constant panic induced spell checked ramblings...I have enjoyed it so far - its been cathartic. I love writing about H and I.

In the coming months, I am looking forward to putting all of the little touches that typify H and I together for one hell of a party for our friends and especially, our families, then recounting it here for you. There is still a ton to do...Everyone has been so awesome thus far - H's mom and Stepdad (who's input I have really appreciated) for supporting us and our decisions and going out of their way to see things when we can't; her aunt M for being so excited for her niece and coming up with some great ideas and putting us in contact with the right people; my Mom - who is just so excited to have another daughter-in-law (after raising 4 boys, who can blame her?); and our friends, who help keep us grounded during these first stressful months...we hear that we are almost through Phase 1 and then there will be some downtime. That cannot get here soon enough...

So, apparently, I have been tagged...

I was tagged earlier this morning by Bailee's Bride from Bailee's Bride - a blog for brides (and the people and pooches who humor them during their momentary departure from sanity)

I am new to this blog game - so, I don't want to be blackballed by the Wedding Blogger's union or really any union (though, if we could have a Dan Sears v. Steve Sanders "KEG" House blackball ceremony, I could get behind that). A little something about Bailee's Bride, while I am thinking about it...I like her site. H likes her site...it turns out that she knows the author from their days in law school. If you read her posts, you will probably notice one or two similarities - namely, we are all getting married in Indianapolis - and we all have impeccable taste in planners...small world. In any event, H, e-mailed her yesterday, so I appreciate the shout-out.

That said, I will only go to third base on this one. I linked to Bailee's Blog. Its only fair. I will talk about myself...which, obviously, I love. I'll even link to other blogs - because, despite the fact that English departments across the country blame "blogs" and "blogging" for the decline of appropriate and even thought-provoking writing - these seven are - at the very least - written well enough or cleverly enough to hold my attention (despite my rock hard standards). I'm just not going to go and post and force them to link to me. I don't even know if I want that much action here.

First, here are the rules I must follow for being tagged:
1. Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by including links to their blog.
4. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog!

Without further adieu...

1. I routinely wake up at 6 AM to watch Arsenal football matches and drink heavy beers...
2. I read Kurt Vonnegut's entire catalogue in the summer between my Junior and Senior years at Miami
3. I want to take comedy classes - not improv though, just comedy writing.
4. Until last November, I had never been West of Iowa City
5. I hate shoes and socks
6. I don't mind when the Pug licks my feet for 15-20 minutes straight
7. In the last 2 days, I have watched 6 episodes of "Bridezillas" on the WE channel...seriously.

Now, I recommend:
1.) I'm bringing blogging back
2.) Arseblog
3.) It happened last night - Gossip Girl
A must read every Tuesday Morning...
4.) Paper Doll - Chicago
we were in here last week - we love their invitations...and their house Pug, Maude.
5.)Monaville Road
6.) Nathanial Edmunds Phlog
7.) Long Live Locke

OK then - a quick aside - it does not appear that I received the Uber-blog award or whatever I may/may not have been nominated for...stay tuned for my expose on sexism in wedding blogging...

Eleven Eleven...

Its fitting that tomorrow is Remembrance Day. Three years ago tomorrow, my Dad, Buzz, passed away. It was, without a doubt, the most harrowing, exhausting days of my life.

Buzz and I were close. We talked. He was hilarious. He was understated, introspective and quiet. He worked hard. He was honest. He was proud of my brothers and I. He loved his wife. He had a basic understanding of what was right and he did his best to stay on that side of the line. He was a good man. I try to be like that everyday. A day doesn't pass that I don't wish for one more day with him or that I would have met him for that beer for my 27th birthday or called him back after he left a VM for me describing a Northwestern v. Wisconsin football game days before he went in for the surgery.

I miss him, especially around this time of year. I am saddened by the fact that he never met H. It was almost a full year after he passed away that we met. At times, it is inconceivable to me that the woman I am going to spend the rest of my life with only knows my Dad through stories I have told. He would have absolutely adored her. Buzz would have been immediately taken by H's energy, her passion and compassion - just like I was. I wish that I could hear my Dad's old stories about me (the one's he always told my GFs when they first came to the house) just one last time (and that H could hear them as well, of course). They would have been fun to be around. H is the type of woman who can take a joke. My Dad was the type of guy that liked to hand it out a little.

The fact that his presence at our wedding will be resorted to a candle and a photograph hurts. I would have liked to have him there. I would have liked to hear his speech at the Rehearsal dinner. I would have loved to see him try to dance with my Mom. I would like that moment, when I catch his eye, raise my glass and nod in his direction - a thank you for being my Dad. These are amongst the things I will be thinking about on September 12, 2009, when H and I are married.

The last time I saw him I was leaving his room at the care center. I shook his hand and turned around as I left and said "I love you Dad" and then repeated it to make sure he knew...

You are missed...